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HUMANE SEXUALITY: ALL PEOPLE ARE SEXUAL— FROM BIRTH TO DEATH
Everyone is sexual—young or old, woman or man, straight or gay, married or single, rich or poor, abled or disabled. Being a sexual person does not necessarily include having sex. It means that we all have sexual feelings about ourselves and other people, whether we act on those feelings or not.
Sometimes these feelings include sexual desire. Sexual desire is a strong physical attraction. We could be attracted to someone we just see on TV or on the street, but whom we never meet. Or perhaps it is someone we talk to every day, at work or at the gym. Sometimes our attractions are just passing flirtations. Sometimes they may be all we can think about. Or sometimes the people we are attracted to are only fantasies we create in our minds.
There are many personal qualities that can attract us. We may be attracted to people because of their intelligence or ambition. We may be attracted to people who have an interest or sense of humor similar to our own. We may be attracted to people who treat us with kindness, sensitivity, and respect. Or we may be attracted to people simply for the way they smile.
Sexual desire and love are not the same thing. Love is a strong caring for someone else. It comes in many forms. There can be love for romantic partners, for close friends, for parents and children, for God, and for humankind. Love can exist without sexual desire, and sexual desire can exist without love. Many people are happiest when both love and sexual desire are shared between both partners.
When Does Sexuality Start?
We begin learning about sexuality as infants and never stop learning. As our bodies, minds, and social environments change during our lifetimes, so do our feelings, beliefs, behaviors, and sexual knowledge. Here is a brief guide to show how sexuality is experienced at different ages and what role parents and other caregivers can play in developing their child’s healthy sexuality. But remember, everyone is sexually unique! People can grow and change in very different ways— physically, mentally, and emotionally. So if we or people we know experience this process differently, that is perfectly normal, too.
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